Before you read
If you really want to feel my vibe I was listening to this music while I penned the post
Escapate Conmigo by Wisin, original or remix.
Saturday morning. Weekends are amazing, isn’t it. I’m up so early in my PJs, had my coffee and dancing to the soul of Spanish music, nah not the Despacito bullshit, that’s for average people. Wait a minute.
Mirror on the wall, Why am I in my mother’s flip-flops ehh??.… don’t you josh me like that..
Something in the lyrics caught my eye. It reads “tu me seduces a tu antojo” it translates to “you seduce me to your whim” whim meaning change of mind all of a sudden. What is it about a woman? I mean I was at a house party once. This girl showed up, French kind. Curly brown hair, white woman obviously. Everything is in slow motion at this point. She asks for a drink in the huskiest voice possible and the whole floor shut down. Like literally. Music stops, people freeze, glass bottles shatter and pout selfies loose hope. I don’t know what happened. Mankind has been to the moon and back but this kind of mystery can’t be solved.
How can somebody break down something handsome, strong, tall and bearded (aka men) into a soft kitty. I don’t know ask a woman. By the way, that slow motion story is not real. I made it up. The girl is real, DEFINITELY. I know because I sipped her drink, WHOA!! look at my stature. You won’t believe me at this point. I am not bothered.
Majestic, graceful, beautiful, sophisticated, gentle, classy, adorable, exquisite, divine, elegant and the list goes on. How can a woman exude so many characteristics? There is nothing on wheels that would rival that, but cars are still referred to as a ‘she’. There must be a reason why Mr Johnny would wake up every sunday and run to his garage to wax and tickle his cars body.
In my world, there is only one kind of a car that could rival a woman. Meaning I would choose it over my beloved. It’s called a Ferrari, all in its Italian glory. Why have I chosen this over other cars? Well, because Ferraris have always been the ultimate representation of an automobile. They have a sense of seduction and raw majesty that other cars just cannot match. Genuinely cannot. I understand the essence displayed by these automotive pieces. I could have chosen something German ie BMW, Audi or Mercedes but all they justify is my engineering degree. Not fun ya?
A Lamborghini for example is like an expensive hooker, I don’t dig that. A Ferrari is like a graceful woman in bustier lingerie. Why bustier, because it’s MY show you idiot. And then the car does portray all the characteristics about women that I just mentioned. Even the husky voice plays a role. Ferraris are not loud but its more like an exquisite symphony put together by the sweetest instruments. They sound so sonorous, I have to change pants. Sorry !! lol
Lets talk about the Ferrari 488 GTB for our description. The only feminine figure that comes in my mind at the moment is Marilyn Monroe. I’ve not met her but her photos alone describe her grace. Oh please keep the lingerie away, please. I’m trying to make a point here. The front facia of the car has the right amount of cheek bone structure with subtle eyes and lashes, represented by the headlamps. The bonnet is like a nose, god this is difficult to describe, me struggling to get you in my world. The roof of the car is black making it look like dark hair combed into a messy bun. The wheels represent ankle strap heels with revealing toes probably, because wheels are the most important elements in terms of aesthetics and they also uncover the colourful brake callipers, got that?.
And then the posterior. Its not too “in your face” wink wink hahaha. Bless me… there is enough flair and curvature to tickle your inner soul, the prancing horse being the jewellery to drape in more sizzle. You see the glass on the back? Well that’s my favourite portion. It’s the same real estate where the dimples on her back would reside, mmwwaahh. Am having shivers. This is enough.
Getting in the cabin, you are invited into the preciously sewed leather with a very soft touch. The interior on its own should describe the warmth and nurturing comfort of a woman. It is just lovely to be tucked in. Everything is beautifully laid out to make the driver feel raunchy. Let that sink in. Performance, not something that I want to talk about as this write up is purely for reading than a dealership brochure.
Take an average car for reference, it would have approximately 100-150 horsepower. The Ferrari deploys 660 horsepower. Imagine the speeds it is capable of. Most sport cars tend to lose control while going sideways at high speeds, to avoid it there are electronics that automatically apply braking without your inputs. Incase of the Ferrari, it allows you to speed up sideways whilst its being safe in the background. Basically, its saying ‘You can push harder, daddy’. Okay am not going any further with the words sweaty, wild, wet… use your imagination for the climax.
Phew I said that?..hahaha..
A woman in reality would suffer from the intricacies of being human. There are dreams to follow, life to live, broken boys to fix. It must be difficult to be feminine in the first place. Even Marilyn had an arduous upbringing and she rejuvenated from that. Which means my lovely Ferrari is not perfect? Yes it isn’t. They tend to fall apart for unknown reasons and maintaining it can dry out your bank account. They lose value as they get older. But I can persevere, that’s the only reason its more human like. A dolled-up girl is a girl after all, hmm??
My apologies for the crazy combination of concepts but I had to describe what ‘she’ means about a car. I think I have finally. Women, you are special. Thank you for the inspiration.
Now where is my music?